I feel sort of stuck. Like everything I've written and posted to date is junk, and nothing I could share in the future will be worthwhile. Who cares about any of this, really? The internet could blow up tomorrow, and everything on it will be dust in the wind.
Wow. That's depressing! Except I am not depressed. I'm happy, so this blogger's block took me by surprise. I'm slightly anxious over my new job -- the first week was great, but I have a lot to learn. Change, even good change, is stressful. Big picture -- it's healthy to get outside your comfort zone. I am confident in my abilities. I know in my heart that challenge and opportunity trump fear.
Also on the positive news meter, I've come to terms with the role writing and blogging have in my life. I always wanted to make a living writing but now realize I don't have the guts for surviving on the financial edge. I'll take all the stresses of the workplace over the stress of wondering how the bills get paid. It's liberating to just write and know I don't have to make money at it.
Maybe that's my problem. I'm not hungry anymore. I have a good job. Why blog? I blog because I want a seat at the table where all the good stuff is being discussed! I don't want to miss a thing. Plus, I am motivated simply by the art and craft of writing. Writing is fulfilling in a way no job can touch.
Some might say I lack focus, but being driven to pursue varied interests makes for a more balanced and interesting life. Plenty of driven, balanced and interesting people have exceptional careers. We do not have to surrender our complete selves just because we work.We are all complex beings, and as such, why put all our eggs in one basket? My professional career is very important to me, but so is writing, reading, walking, shopping, cycling, swimming, golfing, camping, good food, good drink and watching "Chopped."
See? Writing about it brings clarity. I'll do my best to hop over this block and come back with something you will enjoy reading.
Thank you for your patience.
